Over-Thinking

When one is stuck in a grove of pines all day, chopping, sorting and piling branches beyond their heart's content, thinking becomes a necessary escape from the endless scape of evergreens.

So tonight, rather coincidentally, I came across this article: 13 Things People Who Overthink Are Tired of Thinking About

I don't think I over-think all of the things mentioned in the article. ....but usually when I do over-think I know that I am ...which only makes it worse. It's a downward spiral of delusions and desperation that usually brings about insanity and paranoia.

Okay.
Maybe I'm being a bit extreme here. :) It's not a bad think to think. In fact most people don't think enough so it could be argued that some of us over-thinkers are simply making up for the lack of thinking that goes on in the brains of the majority non-thinkers. Then again I would bet that those of us who think too much wouldn't have so much to think and worry about if there weren't so many careless people out there not thinking!

Yeah..... it's getting a little too late to keep up with so much circular reasoning. Anyways, It's Wednesday. Maybe that explains it. Mid-week mind trauma.

Let us conclude with a few words that are infinitely wiser than anything I can pull out of the box tonight:

Philippians 4:4-9
⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice.
⁵ Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.
⁶ Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
⁷ And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
⁸ Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
⁹ Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.

There it is: Rejoice in the Lord. Be moderate. Don't worry, but instead, pray. Think about praiseworthy things ...things of good report and virtue. 
Peace will ensue.

The Good Life

I found this post in my draft folder. I must have been too busy to finish it or to remember to post it. I normally wouldn't post something this out of date, but I'm going to because it takes me back to the days when we still had Leela. :) What a blessing that year was, with our beautiful baby Leela.
Here's an old post... probably from some time around late May or early June:

Things have been lovely lately! So much fun and so much work. The Spring is here, the grass is green and there is sooooo much sunshine to enjoy.

I don't have a lot of time to write about the things I've been up to but I have a few pictures to share.

Hanging in a tree with my niece and nephew, Meadow and Dexter, along with their uncle Kalen. Climbing trees is fun... unless you're Dexter. ;)

I got to go swimming at the Kalahari with my good friend Courtney, her boyfriend Robbie and my brother Isaac! It was a random adventure and such a blast!

I was driving through Eau Claire the other day with some friends and there was a HUGE turkey struttin' his stuff right in the middle of town!

Leela came out for a while at a bonfire we had. Such a little cutie!

So many memories at Moe's!!

BONFIRES!!!! This is what summer is all about!!

Milking a lot of cows... it's so hot and sweaty between those big cows when the weather warms up!

Here I am with our little goat ...named Goatleigh! ;) She's more like a pet dog. hehe!

Cat's find the most curious nooks and crannies to rest on! ;)

Those pictures!!!!

I was browsing facebook and came across these articles about friends and siblings who took the same picture every so many years! It reminded me of Courtney, Sandy and I!!! =D

Here are the links:

4 sisters
5 friends

And speaking of pictures with friends, here are a few pictures from this summer when Courtney and Robbie gave me a surprise visit!!! =D

 Courtney also came and helped me at work one morning, 

which as a surprise as well!! =D The cats liked her company too!

 ....I think we have a thing for hopping into random lakes. ;)

 Couldn't be more grateful for this girl's friendship!!!

October

It is a windy, damp morning as I sit here at my computer. From the kitchen I can hear the sizzle of eggs frying in bacon grease and coffee streaming and sputtering into the pot. Against the windows rain is colliding with a little help from the wind. It's already 8AM and the rising sun is no where to be seen, hiding behind dark, heavy clouds. The pounding of the rain woke me up several times throughout the night, which makes for eyelids that are heavy, too. The leaves on the trees look beautiful with the water luminously displaying the fall hues. It's interesting how on a grey day like this the colors are more vibrant.

Things are a bit more relaxing than they have been in a few months, although there are always so many things to get done and never enough time in a day. I think it's time to bring out the Winter clothes and put away the articles worn in Summer. This time of year always makes me want to get on Pinterest and browse the recipes for pumpkin flavored everything.

Anyway, it's about time head back to work (since I milked once already this morning). Maybe next time I will write about something more substantial.

Courtney's Response

My lovely friend Courtney commented on my blog post, Why I Am Still Single. Her words were so good and insightful. I agree with the points she made, and truly it IS a privilege to be single. It is where God puts us first in life... so it is definitely an important and significant role. Anyways, I thought I'd share Courtney's words you. I especially like the part about God being and gentleman! =) Read and enjoy:

"Hey there Mary Ellen,

So first of all, I'd say singleness really isn't bad after all :) I think it's a privilege actually- just think about all the freedom in it really- getting to get to know all these wonderful people without having to feel attached to any of them unless of course you decide to.

I would say that dating or courtship both are kind of ridiculous when you think about.. and this is why I think so - because if you are friends with someone- you go out, hang out, and see if you like the person- enjoy being with the person- and how the person is like with their friends.

Now I don't necessarily agree that you have to be with a group of people, though, I consider it to be more fun once you are dating to go out with groups, but especially if you are friends, I think going one- on- one to coffee shops and ice cream parlors are fun- just make it casual and fun! :) And it doesn't have to be a date- :) And once you are dating, I think it's a good idea to spend a lot of time doing events together to have fun- and see the other persons character in a variety of circumstances.

I just went to a conference though, and they said that right now, us people (young adults) are in a time of waiting... and we want to just go for it- but God is developing us so that when we are ready we will fly far- (like a stretched rubber-band, sometimes it hurts but then you fly)

Also, I learned that God is a gentleman and He will open the doors for us. There will be other doors along the way and we may choose to walk through them ourselves, and God won't be mad at us, but we will have to deal with the consequences for not waiting for Him.

So all-together, be patient, be vigilant, and make God your first love and everything will fall into place. :)

Love you friend!!!"

Why I Am Still Single

It was my older sister who first told me that I should read an article that I had seen floating around on my Facebook home page. I hadn't exactly felt like reading it each time I'd noticed it, mostly because I was tired of hearing how wrong I was in doing things differently from the rest of the world. However, my sister, who was happily married after going through a courtship process, was telling me that this blog post on why courtship is fundamentally flawed was worth at least considering.

I opened it up and read the first few paragraphs about dating, was somehow distracted away, and then never finished reading the post.
It wasn't until a fellow whom I had only been around twice, and had never even talked to (but who hung out with a group a nice Christian friends people who I did know), added me as a friend on Facebook and said he'd like hanging out because I seemed nice and different. Now there's nothing so terrible about this until you understand that this guy had no idea about courtship... in fact, to him, hanging out at his apartment (shared with 3 other guys), seemed to him like going above and beyond the call of duty, since it was a group setting. However, to someone raised in a conservative, courtship-minded world, that seemed like quite a compromise to say the least. Chaperones, family approval, plenty of getting to know each other in appropriate/approved settings, serious questions, serious intentions... serious plans. Always beginning with the end in mind.

Don't get me wrong... it's not that I don't still think courtship has a number of good elements. In fact if I had to choose between the dating and courting I'd go with the latter because of the possibility for a lack of intention and maturity in the prior option. But... somewhere between liberal dating and conservative courting there seems to be a missing link.

The point with this friendly stranger was that I had no way of getting to know him, and really courtship is only designed for people who all ready know each other well enough to form major opinions about, with marriage in mind. How does one get to know a complete stranger without coming in armed and loaded with the heavy response of commitment in a courtship situation? If the only people you can run out and court comfortably are people you already know, and you only know people you can hang out with in group settings... then you are limited to your social circles and maybe a few church conferences from time to time. 

...which is exactly why so many people who've committed to a courtship system are still single. Like me. There are so many fish in the sea but put your hook, line and sinker in a pond and you'll wonder why it's taking so long to catch any fish. ...and then maybe the fish you do eventually catch aren't exactly what you're looking for so you send them back to the water... and wait another 5 or 10 years.

Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating a bit but sometimes it seems quite a bit like that scenario of fishing in a fish-less fishing hole.

Anyways, back to the guy who wanted to hang out and get to know me...
In desperation, and feeling like I had to defend a complete stranger to my parents... (someone whom I wasn't even sure if I even liked or was interested in) just to get to know him, I told my mom she should check out this article on courtship that my sister had recommended to me. 


So my mom read Thomas Umstattd's article before I did...

...and she liked it.

All of that just to say, I think the points that Thomas Umstattd made in his article, Why Courtship Is Fundamentally Flawed ...and also the Q&A , are worth at least considering.
 
I especially liked his reason number one for why Mr. Umstattd doesn't recommend guys go after "dragon guarded women": 
"Getting parental approval to start makes things too intense too quickly. Getting permission to enter a relationship whose purpose is marriage, before getting to know the girl, is like stepping on the gas while also stepping on the brakes. That is not a healthy way to start a relationship. Better to begin as “just friends” who get coffee or ice cream every now and again. Please read the original post for all of the problems that come from getting too intense too soon. Here is another way to think of it: it’s like trying to bake cookies at 500 degrees. The higher temperature the harder it is to avoid burnt cookies."

Or as Doug Wilson said in his book, "Her Hand In Marriage", "You can't preheat the oven without cooking the roast." 

Exactly, Mr. Umstattd and Mr. Wilson! 
I know that even though my parents didn't put the pressure on me to get it right the first time, I wanted to get married at a young age, start a family with the man of my dreams and enjoy the ups and downs of life with that same man until death parted us. After all a lot of people I knew were doing just that... so the pressure was on. Don't fail. Get it right the first time. If you court and do it God's way things will go well.
Needless to say, that first relationship was half baked before it was even in the oven. And it failed. And I learned a LOT. And here I sit telling you why I'm still single... at the age of 22.

Yes, I know, I'm still quite young. I still have big plans and dreams about marriage. But maybe it's time for a different approach. Not to run and throw the baby out with the bathwater.... but it might be time to re-evaluate the conundrums of the courtship system. 

Anyways, what's the rush? Who's to say....? Maybe singleness isn't so bad after all.

On Ethnicity

On documents and forms they often ask me to select my ethnicity. I couldn't help but notice that all the choices have corresponding places but my choice is simply "white".... I've never been to White before but I'm sure it's cold... probably too much snow there. They really should have "pink" or "beige" on the list. ....or maybe seasonal options like "tan in the summer but a waxy grey in the winter".... yeah, anyways. ;)